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About a year ago, Joshua Harris and his director, Jessica Van Der Wyngaard, announced that they were collaborating on a project together.
One that would show Joshua Harris reflecting on his best-selling book, .
I was skeptical, as many were, about what this meant.
I personally knew many people who had bought the book, and I witnessed church leaders use it as a religious text akin to Scripture itself.
No one would have ever dared to admit that their devotion to this book had reached that level, but the message that my generation in the evangelical church heard was clear: God had a very specific system in mind for finding a spouse.
Harris had reached a point where he'd have to stop and reevaluate his thoughts on his book.
He recognized that he needed to sit and actively listen to what others were telling him of their experiences with the book and the culture that he'd helped push to the center stage of evangelical thought.
Harris posited that, had Julie given in to her feelings towards her boss, she would have been guilty of ruining his marriage and family.
There are complete falsehoods about the nature of relationships and attachment.He repeatedly cautioned his audience that any kind of alone time—including phone calls—should be minimal.Many of his claims had massive repercussions for those who read the book and grew up in the culture where these things were considered gospel truth.The book's intro describes a dream of a couple on their wedding day, and all of the past girlfriends who stood next to the groom at the altar.The message: the groom had given away bits of his heart to every other woman he had dated before his wife.I was ready to be angry, expecting to hear a Christian leader dismiss the hurt that his words from twenty years ago had caused. The cynic in me began to get nervous that this could be the beginning of a dangerous narrative that set him up as a great leader who meant well and whose only crime was loving the church too much.